I am so sick of the mind games we play with people we care about. I hate that I have to be a bitch to the guy I love and ignore him for days so he'll pay some kind of attention to me. That's an eye opening sentence, why the fuck do I still even care? There are atleast 2 guys out there who do nothing but try to be with me and I don't give them the time of day, they are the ones who actually deserve a chance. When the fuck am I going to realize that this dude doesn't care about me? Why pretend like you don't want to spend time with me until I freak out. what an asshole. and a loser.
My sister says I need to be by myself for a while and not date anybody, but since I have literally lost all my friends because I keep going back to the asshole, it's a pretty lonely existance. And by the way, what "friend" stops being your friend for the mistakes you make.
Whatever, I just want to get to Texas and be done with this place, like chelsea handler said tonight, this place is making a lot of fertilizer and it's growing a lot of ASSHOLES.
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I hope you don't think I'm not still your bestie booski. I love you. You will always be my bestie. You've been there with me through some crazy shit and I want you to be there through the crazy shit to come. Always. I'm sorry I have been so shitty and distant lately. Life has been throwing me curve balls and all sorts of shit as of late. But I'm going to Kenosha this weekend and I'll be back Monday...shall we have a date sometime next week? As of now I don't work Thursday or Friday :)
Also. I agree wholeheartedly with Timnah the wise. ;) And I think we're both coming from the same place here...we don't want you hurt and you deserve a little self-love. Well, a lot of it. When you love you, the right kind of boy will take notice. I promise. Or girl ;) lol
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